After a promotion at work, there’s so much to think about. One of the most important things to remember is that the workplace behaviors that got you where you are may not be the ones that will help you keep moving forward.
That’s especially true when it comes to your communication style, particularly around decision-making. All too often, I see new managers or leaders undermine their credibility by continuing to ask permission on decisions as if they are still in their previous role.
Why is this such a big deal? Regularly asking for permission conveys that you lack confidence. And that, in turn, leads to others losing confidence in your ability to lead.
The solution? Shifting from asking to informing. This is one of those “unwritten rules” of work. It doesn’t get talked about a lot, but it makes a big difference in how effective a leader is. Whether you're navigating a new leadership role yourself or you’re managing or mentoring someone who's just gotten promoted, understanding this unwritten rule is essential.
What's the Difference Between Asking for Permission and Informing?
At first glance, the distinction might seem subtle, but the impact on a leader’s personal brand can be significant. Read these two statements and notice your gut reaction to each one.
I've explored several options, and I have identified the best one to resolve our budget issue. Are you OK with it? Can I move forward?
I've explored several options, and I'm confident that I have identified the best one to resolve our budget issue. I'll move forward with this unless you have any major concerns.
While both messages convey the same basic information, the tone and implied confidence levels are very different. The first scenario positions the asker as seeking approval, which potentially undermines their authority. The second demonstrates their capability to make decisions while still respecting the organizational hierarchy.
The Risks of Too Much Asking
It's common for newly promoted leaders to err on the side of caution by frequently asking for permission. This behavior comes from a positive place. The asker may want to show deference to the leaders above them or demonstrate that they are open and collaborative. This can be a good approach in some situations. But when asking is overused, it can backfire. Constantly seeking approval before acting can have several negative consequences:
Damaged credibility. Others may start to wonder whether the leader can, in fact, make independent decisions. Team members might even start going around them to the "real" decision-maker.
Entrenched micromanagement. Constantly asking a micromanager for permission just adds fuel to the fire of their unproductive behavior.
Stalled progress. Waiting for approval on every decision can slow down processes, hurt productivity and lead to missed opportunities.
How to Shift from Asking to Informing
Whether you’re the one who needs to inform more and ask less or you’re helping a team member through this transition, here are some strategies that can help. You can use these steps yourself or make them part of coaching conversations with your team member
Reflect. Think about your recent interactions. How often did you ask for permission around decisions instead of simply informing others?
Pause before asking. When you're about to ask for permission, stop and consider whether the decision falls within your authority. If it does, how can you rephrase your communication to inform rather than ask?
Provide clear rationale. When informing others of your decisions, concisely explain your logic. This demonstrates that you understand the big picture and that you've thought through the implications.
Express confidence. Use language that conveys your confidence in your decision-making ability.
Invite feedback judiciously. Instead of asking for permission, you might say something like, "Unless you have any major concerns, I'll proceed with this approach."
Examples of Informing Statements
What does it sound like to inform others while maintaining your respect for their role? Here are some phrases that demonstrate both consideration and decision-making capability:
I've analyzed the situation and determined the best course of action. I'll move forward with this plan unless you see any significant issues I might have overlooked.
Given our current priorities, I've decided to allocate resources as follows ... Please let me know if you need any clarification on this approach.
After careful consideration, I'm confident this is the right direction for our team. I'll begin implementation next week and keep you updated on our progress.
I know we have a lot going on, and I want to be respectful of your time. I've done the groundwork, feel good about the direction, and am ready to move forward.
Supporting Your Team's Growth
If you're managing someone who's recently been promoted, you can play a crucial role in helping them start informing more and asking less. This is beneficial for both of you. Your team member will improve their ability to communicate with confidence and impact. And you’ll free up more time in your day when you don’t have to sign off on all of their decisions.
Here are some ways that you can support their growth and independence:
Set clear expectations. Let your team member know that you expect them to make decisions within their scope of authority.
Provide feedback. When they ask for your permission unnecessarily, talk about how they could have informed instead and what they can do in a similar situation next time.
Delegate for development. Give them chances to make decisions on their own and support them, even if the outcome isn't perfect.
Set an example. Demonstrate informing (rather than asking) in your own interactions with your superiors.
Spark reflection. Encourage them to think about how their communication style affects how others perceive them as a leader.
Developing Leadership Skills: What's Next?
Mastering the art of informing rather than asking permission projects confidence, demonstrates decision-making competence, and establishes leadership credibility. But honing a new communication style is just one of the many adjustments involved in taking on a new role.
If your organization is looking for innovative ways to support and train new leaders and managers, I invite you to explore Newberry Solutions’ New Lens® learning platform. New Lens is a Capability Academy that focuses on core leadership strategies — like impactful communication — that have helped over 75% of our clients in Fortune 500 companies get promoted. To schedule a demo or learn more, visit https://www.newlensleadership.com. You can also join in the conversation about this article on my LinkedIn page. Share the communication strategies that worked for you as a new manager or leader, and let me know if there are more unwritten rules of leadership that you’d like me to cover in an upcoming blog article.